#132 What to do with your faith when God asks you to wait with Sabrina Carter

Hey girl. Hey, welcome to the unapologetically unstoppable  podcast. And in today's episode, we've got Sabrina Carter, and I'm so excited to bring her on because she is a force to be reckoned with. Sabrina Carter is the host of renew her strengths podcast and creator of an intimate Facebook community for Christian women in waiting.

She's on a mission to bring hope and support to women navigating the challenges faced during seasons of waiting. As a woman who understands the depths of trying to navigate the unknowns of life. She recognizes the feelings of exhaustion, overwhelm, and hopelessness that often accompany this journey.

Through her own experiences, she has learned that waiting doesn't have to be torturous. With the right support, mindset, and community, it can be a time of beautiful transformation and growth. Her prayer is that women will stop wasting this precious time and instead fully embrace each day and every little blessing along the way as you wait for God to fulfill his desire for your life.

Whether you're waiting for a husband, a child, healing, direction, or something else, she's here to offer you encouragement and a community of like minded women to help you become who God created you to be through this season and beyond. Welcome. How are you doing today?

Thank you so much, Jeanette. I'm doing awesome.

Thanks. How are you?

Good. So, um. Season of waiting. I feel like like right now I'm in this hotel. I'm waiting to get to my next destination. So it's like the perfect talk for me right now. Good times. Yes. So when you are talking about your season of waiting, what is something that you. You decided that you need this community.

How is that for you? When, when did you first be like, I need to create this community because I am waiting, or maybe I see somebody else that's waiting. What was

that like?

Yeah. So that actually happened just recently, about six months ago, I was kind of feeling a transition phase from my previous business.

I was in the health and fitness space for many years, and I'm still very passionate about that. And I just felt like God was maybe redirecting me, so my husband and I are actively waiting for a baby and have been for about 18 months. I had a miscarriage in March, so there was like a little bit of hope for a minute, and then some, you know, terrible loss from that.

But, uh, a few months later, as we continued to try and continue to wait, I just You know, really looked back at my life and have seen many different seasons. I actually didn't get married until I was 36. And so there was, you know, many, many years, I thought I would be married at 25. And so I, I waited many years for my husband and, um, just different, different experiences throughout my own life of waiting for different things.

And looking back, I really didn't have a community through those times. And then now in this active weight, I really felt like, okay, this is something I felt like God actually asked me. If you started, like, a ministry around this, if you knew it could help you and one other person, like, would you do it? And I was like, yes, like anything I can do to help, honestly, to be a little bit selfish, like, help me, like, I need help, God, this is so hard, um, because I'm now 39, and so to have no children at 39 has obviously, like, its own pressures in society and science and all, and so I felt like, okay, yes, like, I'm willing to take on kind of a different business aspect, right, more of a ministry, and share my story as I'm actively going through it.

So I don't, I don't have a success story yet. And my promise is never to help expedite the wait right? Like it's not to help you figure out how to get out of the waiting faster. That's not what it's about. I really felt like God was just asking me to be obedient and to share my journey of like, what does faith look like in a season of waiting?

Because. Yeah. As you know, maybe from different seasons of your life, waiting can be so treacherous physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, right? Like, if you're waiting for five years for financial breakthrough or for healing or for your business to take place or whatever it is, it can really weigh on you in so many different areas.

And so I just felt like God asked me to be obedient with this and open it up for other women because I really didn't know of any other community specifically around Um, around waiting. And so that, that's how it came about. I

love that for like a couple of reasons, right? If God asking you, hey, what about if it just helps you and one other person, would you do it?

And sometimes we're like, but God, I feel like I'm just made for so much more. I can't just do this for one person, but for you to be obedient, because we all know that's God's love language and just saying, yes, I will do whatever you have for me. Even if you don't deliver me, even if. I don't see it tomorrow, even if I know your promises, and I know you will, but I'm here for the waiting.

I'm here for whatever this season is, and I will embrace it. I feel like both me and you are very like, A type personalities, and I love to control things.

Yes. Amen.

I feel like being in the waiting and like, in that surrender is very, very hard. And for you to just like, accept it and be like, okay, God, I trust you in this waiting season.

I'm just gonna do it because you're telling me to, not for any other reason. That's, that's powerful in itself right there. I

love that. Thank you. And yeah, to be honest, it has actually been really helpful. As we all know, if, if we learn something and then have to teach it, it really, it, it makes it more permanent, right?

Like you really have to understand something in order to be able to teach it. And so in the community, you know, I offer like a once a month, , prayer and community call, and I just feel like whenever God teaches me something or shows me something, or if I watch a YouTube video or let's do a podcast or something that's really encouraging to me, I now feel like I want to pay it forward and share it, you know?

And then sometimes as I'm just sharing something I've learned, I'm like having my own aha moments of like, okay, God, you are working, you know, like I'm able to see more of what he's doing because I'm being vocal and I'm looking for it so that I have stuff to share with my community, you know? So it's been, it's been really great in that standpoint as well.

So

you have a, it sounds like a deep relationship with God. How did you start walking with God? I feel like most people know God in some way, but like actually walking with him every day is a different thing. So how did that, how did that journey come about?

So I was very blessed to grow up in a Christian home.

I will say my mom was more the spiritual leader. My dad was a believer, but not, he wasn't really like the spiritual leader of the household. So it was really a lot of my mom that did Bible teaching and, you know, encouraged us to go to church and Bible study and all. So I grew up, with a pretty solid faith, but as we all know, the real test comes when your faith is tested, right?

And so when you're actually, like, your faith is, is, , put to the fire, I guess you would say, where you actually have an experience to execute what you say that you know or believe. And so that happened for me, well back up a little bit, I went to a year long discipleship program at a church in San Diego when I lived down in Southern California.

That was a year long program where we spent, you About four hours a day. It was really like a school, , learning really about the Bible and about evangelism. So there was a ministry track, a marketplace track and a missions track. And it really started as like a missionary training school. It was mostly for missionaries.

And then they opened it up for people that are in business and for people that wanted to do ministry. And at that time I had just started my health and fitness business. And so that. That was a pivotal experience for my faith because that was something like I had to pay for. I had to sacrifice my time, my energy, and it was more than just like going to church on a Sunday.

So I learned a lot about God, about how to really read and interpret the Bible and apply it, and built some really good like spiritual disciplines like understand fasting and you know just really learning about how to live for God. And then, let's see, about three years later, my sister, who was 33 at the time, and had a six week old baby, was diagnosed with stage four colorectal cancer, out of nowhere.

sadly she died in December of: 2020

And so that was another season of waiting. , just like a little side note, like another season of waiting for our family where we were so hopeful and confident and like positive that she was going to get the healing that we believed she was going to have. And so yes, thank God she is in heaven and I believe, you know, that we will see her again.

It wasn't the healing that we expected. And so after that happened, really, to be honest, my biggest fear in losing her was that it was going to make me lose my faith. Like I was like, I don't know that I can still believe in God if this doesn't work out. And that actually didn't happen, , when she passed, I didn't have that emotion and I was very grateful, but unfortunately, , 10 months later my dad died from COVID, and that was unexpected.

Yeah, and so that was actually the kicker for me to really go down, , it was a dark season of my life. Something that was really necessary because like I said, your faith is one thing if it's taught to you and it's just how you are raised and this is what you know, it's a different thing when you actually have to explore that for yourself.

And so I spent about four months. , completely void of God. I didn't listen to worship music, I didn't go to church, I didn't read the Bible. My husband was praying for me at the time. but I, I wanted nothing to do with God. I really just needed some time to kind of back up and explore this foundation that I had built my life on that wasn't now, like, fulfilling the deepest desires of my soul, right?

That my family members would live. , so there was a, a lot of exploration for me in terms of Like, if, if it's not Jesus, like, what is it? Like, what is life about, and where, what, what is all this for? , like, where else can I go? And, in that time, in God's goodness, I really explored that, like, there really isn't anything else, right?

Like, there is no other spiritual leader who has the same claims that Jesus made. Um, there is no other God that created everything in heaven and on earth and, you know, everything that exists. Um, that is the only God. And so, I had to spend my own time exploring that from literally, like, a square one, um, place.

And You know, so that's been over the course of like the last two years that I've been working really hard, not only to restore my faith and my trust in God because I, I didn't get the outcome that I wanted in those prayers. Um, but. Also just for my own faith, right? So to understand that, like, we don't always get what we want, even if we're doing all the things, even if you're going to church and you're tithing and you're fasting and you're praying and you're not, you know, having, , you're not committing adultery or you're not looking at porn or you're not doing drugs, like even if you're doing everything as you're supposed to, we still don't always get what we, what we think we should get.

And so, you know, that's, that's a lesson that I had to really, really learn and, and be able to. Kind of put aside that whole experience and decide like, am I still going to trust God, even though these things happened? And so that's kind of been my experience over the last few years. And again, I can only say that it's God's goodness that has brought me to the place where I am now.

And, you know, I often say like when we face tragedies like this, we can go technically three directions, right? We can become very bitter and angry and become like an atheist and just decide to believe nothing. We can become kind of mute and monotone and just go through the motions and be apathetic, where we're like, we don't feel sad and we don't feel happy.

We're just going through the motions. Or we can actually decide to grow from the experience and do the work and allow it to transform who we are and, you know, use it to then encourage or bless and comfort others. And so that's naturally my personality. As you said, like I'm very like type A and You know, I'm someone who typically if I put my mind to something, I'm going to do it.

And so that, you know, that's been internal work that I've had to do over the last two years to really be able to solidify the things that I have learned since childhood and kind of renew those. After, like, so much tragedy. I feel like those,

those times where you are like, Okay, I'm gonna, this is gonna suck.

I'm gonna go deep, though, and I'm gonna clear up those wounds and, like, go through that shadow and just clear everything out and bring God's light back into my heart. Is the hardest thing because like you said it's so easy just to be apathetic and be like, you know, whatever God's got this I guess but whatever if he's real, you know what I mean like it just go through that motion and still have that heart pain of God I wanted this so bad.

And you say that you are going to do things for me. And you did not do this you did not deliver. I was reading this book the other day it's called grit don't quit by Bianca Olaf. She's a minister, I don't do know Jasmine star. Her twin

sister loved her. I think I know that

name. Yeah, it's her twin sister, but she's she's a preacher and she was talking about how when the Israelites were brought out of Egypt.

They were kind of doing the same thing they wanted they wanted they wanted they wanted to be. They want not to be slaves so he brought them out of slavery. They wanted money so he gave them all the riches of Egypt. They wanted a new place so he was going to bring them on this journey. They were hungry so he gave them manna.

But they, man, it wasn't good enough, so they wanted meat, and so they, he gave them meat, but like, people were literally dying with how much they were gorging themselves in the gluttony, and like, maybe he knows something that we don't know that is so good that, that this, maybe this could not have been made without your loss, unfortunately.

You know what I'm saying? I feel like, Lots of type a personalities like us. I've got another friends like this, but we are made to go through lots of hard things because he knows we will overcome them. And he knows that we will use it for his glory. So it's, it sucks, girl.

I know. Cause I'm like, okay, God, if I keep doing this ministry, are you going to just make me wait longer?

So I can keep teaching like, come on, don't do that. Or the same, right? Like I remember at one point saying, okay, God, like. I'm done, I don't want to be an example anymore, like I, I'm good, you know, like I've done my part of share, continuing to share my faith through this, and like I'm tired of, of being the example, you know, I remember saying that at one point and, um, although on the flip side, it's like, of course, that's what we want, you know, that we want to be able to, um, to be able to be that for other people, but it, it is not easy.

Especially like, like you said, you're doing all the things, you're fasting and praying. Like, God, come through, I did the fast, I don't hear you, where you at? So, I, I completely feel that. Yeah. So, what do you think makes you unapologetic about your faith? I know we just talked about you having these deep things, but would you say it's more like because you know there's only one God and you see him show up and during the reflection you see all the things that he's done for you?

Yeah, absolutely. I mean, it's like looking back, even though the enemy so much likes to highlight these two significant, very significant experiences for me over the course of my, you know, I was 37 when my dad died. So 37 years. Um, I had a lot of great things happen. I had a really lovely life, really, until my sister got diagnosed.

I didn't know trauma. I didn't know, um, death. I didn't know grief. I didn't know any of that. I had a lot of love in my family. My parents were married for 40 plus years. Like, I, and looking back now and hearing other people's stories, I'm actually able to recognize like, oh, that was actually a gift. That's not the norm for most people, to have Christmases that they love and get lots of presents on their birthday and, you know, have food on the table every night and all these things that I think we naturally can take for granted.

But yeah, I mean, I think it's just through, through the years and really also saying like, What else, what else is there, like, what else can I go to to actually build a foundation for my life and knowing that this isn't it, right? Like, this world is not the end, and so in no other, again, like, no other faith, no other religion is there a God that promises what Jesus promises and what Jesus offers.

And so, to me, it's like, I I had to go back. There was, there was nothing else, you know, and then through my, you know, two years of healing that's still ongoing,, I'm able to see so many ways that God has come through and even in the pain and like reading the Bible, right? There's tons of stories in here about crazy, awful things happening.

I mean, most of the disciples, you know, were killed or beheaded or things. So it's like when we really learn to apply the Bible, it's like, yeah. Our minds want us to think that just because we follow God, we're going to have an easier life. And unfortunately, if anything, it's actually the opposite where it actually gets harder.

Um, but yeah, that's what I would say. It's just been through my experience. And thankfully for the faith that God has given me to continue to desire, to understand him more and learn more about him. It's like, like you said, nothing else really satisfies as. As that as God does, you know, so for

sure, for sure.

So you took a quiz and your spiritual gift was organizing, which is like leaderships. No. So were you surprised by that? No,

not at all.

I think most people take the quiz. They're like, Oh yeah, that's, that's definitely.

No, I just thought it was awesome that you have people do that because most of us don't know our spiritual gifts. And I think it's, it's, yeah, it's just great to, um, highlight that for people so we can really function in, in the role that God has designed us for.

There's, there's a, I was watching something about GIFs the other day and He was like, your gift is, it's like what you should be giving other people. You should just be giving it away constantly. So you should constantly be leading people and constantly be organizing. And I feel like that's what you're doing right now.

Maybe not so much in your first business, but this new iteration of Renew Her Strength is leading and organizing people and building them up. And I feel like this is, this is the start of something big for you.

Thank you. Yeah, I hope so. So, um, and really the, the reason I hope is because I, I know the pain of going through a prolonged season of waiting alone.

And so that's really what I hope to be able to bring to more women is a community. And although there's women in the community waiting for different things, that the weight of waiting is such a common,, struggle. And, and it's not talked about by a lot of people, right? Like most of us. That are, you know, if you're single or you're, you're waiting for babies or things, these are things that not a lot of people want to share.

It's a little bit, I don't know if there's like some shame or insecurity around, um, those struggles or especially if you're waiting for, you know, relational reconciliation or finances or whatever it is. And so that's really my hope is to be able to open up more communication and create, , really like a deep, powerful community so that we can support each other.

Through that season and beyond, right? Because these are lessons that we should learn and be able to like implement moving forward as well.

So what is one thing you've learned on your journey that helps you become unstoppable?

One thing. Yeah. I mean, I'm so many things, but I think the biggest, like the first thing that came to mind was, and what I continue to tell myself now is like if you quit, you are guaranteed to like not get the outcome that you want.

started this journey back in: 2014

I took some breaks and also I haven't been terribly consistent, but what I continue to think about is. If I quit, I definitely am not going to accomplish the goal, you know, and similar with, , you know, the guy who created the light bulb, Thomas Jefferson. Oh yeah, Thomas Jefferson, not Edison. Edison, yes.

And so, , like creating a thousand light bulbs before he got it right. And, you know, just so many people who have maybe achieved the level of success that People strive for it's like no one got there on the first try. No one got there. Not many people get there in one year You know, so I think that's probably the biggest thing that i've learned and that I continue to implement is just remembering that If you give up then you're guaranteed to not actually, you know achieve the goal. So

So my word this year is Continually consistent. No, that's not it. No.

I was like, that's a good one.

I was like, that's the same thing. Continuously consistent. It's, it's consistent connection. It's consistently connecting with different people. So like, being consistent on that. Because when I meet people on the internet, I, I'm an introvert.

So sometimes I'll just like talk a little bit and then I'll fizzle out and I'll be like, whatever. But I need to consistently connect with people. And I feel like that's one of those things that we just need to be consistent with whatever it is we do. Do you have a word of the year? Do you do that?

Yeah, I did last year.

My word was connection, actually. And it was great, yes. And I actually think about people that I connected with. I actually have a few people that I've, like, become friends with from doing podcast interviews, which I love. That's part of the cool part of, like, the podcast network is, you know, you really get to know people well.

And so I've really enjoyed that. And living abroad, you know, it's a little bit different in terms of building relationships. So I've tried to be really intentional about Um, about that. But yeah, you know, when I thought about a word for this year, I went through a couple of different things. Consistency was one of them.

Joy was one of them. Um, belief was one of them. Because again, like, through my experience, um, my ability to believe for things has been, um, Dulled a bit I'll say and I don't want to live like that Like I want to live I'm someone who enjoys like dreaming about the future and things and so belief was one of them And then you know I feel like God just said to me like the word that you need to focus on is Jesus because like Jesus encompasses Everything that I want and need and then some, right?

So, like, yes, I want to feel joy no matter what happens. And, like, how do you get joy from Jesus? Like, I want to be consistent. Like, consi Jesus is consistent, you know? And so, not to be, like, super spiritual, because that's that's not my goal here, but I feel like just if I'm consistently focusing on Him and trying to redirect my attention, my energy, my desires, like, The fulfillment that I want, even from being a mom, the fulfillment I want from building a business, the fulfillment I want from traveling, like whatever it is, all that's amazing and beautiful.

But there's also this slippery slope of like never truly being fulfilled with the things that we think are going to fulfill us. Right. And it all goes back to like, what is the true fulfillment? And it's that deep, like intimate relationship with Jesus. So that is my word for the year. I

love that. I love that.

Love that. Love that. That's so good. When you said consistency, Jesus is consistency. I'm like, yes, that's, maybe that's where it, where it came from for me. It was like, Jesus is who he says he was, will always be. His promises are true. He's not, I can depend on Jesus. He is consistent. That is so good.

So what is your favorite Bible verse and why?

So, I will go with Ephesians 3 20, which has been like my verse, kind of my life verse for many years. I mean, obviously there's so many good verses, especially depending on, you know, what you're going through. I have a couple of books that have scriptures based on, you know, like a word or a feeling that you're struggling with or looking for, and I love those.

But yeah, I would say the whole passage of Ephesians 3, I think it's 14 through 20, talking about like Paul's, spiritual empowerment and being able to, I don't have the whole thing memorized, but it's all about understanding the greatness of God's love, even though it says like it's too vast for us to be able to comprehend.

But it's like when we are in that place of experiences of experiencing the fullness of his love. we then have power for life, and then it says, now glory be to God, by his mighty power, he is able to accomplish infinitely more than we could ever ask or imagine. And so that's Ephesians 3. 20. So it's like, first we have to understand his love, then we tap into his power, and then there's like, the ability to execute, um, or have him execute through us, ultimately, you know, like what his, what his purposes are for us.

And so that would be my favorite verse.

That is a powerful verse. Yeah. Powerful. When I think of Paul, he makes me kind of sad a little bit because he was like, he was such a non believer and then turned into such the most ferocious, like, believer. But it makes me sad because he was so persecuted. He was so hurt.

He was so, like, torn down the entire time. And all he kept saying was, God's got this. Jesus. I love Jesus. And I'm like, If, if we are to become disciples like Paul, We're going to have a lot of things, so we need some swords, girl.

Absolutely. And I think he's even the one that teaches about contentment, right?

It's like, he's the one that's saying, you know, Right, like, I've learned. This is not a, this is not a character or something that people are born with, right? We have to learn how to be content with little or with plenty. And, you know, yeah, looking at him, like, praising God and worshiping God while he's in prison.

Like, getting thrown into prison for preaching the gospel and he's still worshiping. And then, like, to see what happens from that. So I know, it is, you know, when you really think it is wild to, um, see how devoted he was. And everything that happened, yeah. I just want

a little bit of his, his veracity and, like, faith.

Just a little bit.

But not the trials, right? Yeah, yeah, not the

trials. Let's skip that part. Don't throw me in jail. For preaching, geez. Yeah, goodness. So tell me about your Facebook group. Tell me how people can find you. Do you have any freebies? Tell me all the

things. Yeah, absolutely. So my Facebook group, you can find literally just typing in Christian women in waiting.

So that is the title of the group. And it is literally that just, , you don't have to be a believer. You are welcome. No matter what you believe, just know that there is scripture and Bible teaching in the group. So that's really, you know, where we're, we're looking for truth. We're looking for hope and encouragement and, you know, building.

Our character on the word of God and for women in seasons of waiting again for anything And then let's see. I have my podcast and that can be found on any podcast platform called renew her strength still kind of in the, in the early phases, but has some really great episodes so far, and a few interviews, and you'll be one coming up soon, so I'm excited for that.

So those are really the two things that I have right now, and like I said, in the Facebook group is where, , Well, I host a once a month zoom call for the women and that's, it's all free. , so that's coming up here in a few days, but depending on when you launch this, we do it once a month, typically the first Monday of the month.

And , that's what I'm offering as of now. We're actually actively going through a fast and maybe in the future we'll do like a book study or, , a Bible study of some sort, but yeah, that is where you can find me. And then on Instagram, I'm there as well at renew her strength. And at Mrs. Sabrina Carter.

Those are my two handles

there. Well, I'm excited for everybody to connect with you because everybody goes through Seasons of Waving. I think it's just cyclical. You get something, then you wait for the next, and so I feel like everybody needs your support in that Season of Waving. Thank you so much, Sabrina, for being on.

Thanks, Jeanette. I really enjoyed our conversation and I just had, you know, I always enjoy being able again to highlight the things that God has done. And I just appreciate, , your offer and, you know, opportunity to be here on the podcast. Absolutely.

Talk to

All right. Thanks. Take care.